Welcoming New Campers
Steve Baskin
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Some experiences act as milestones in life: college graduation, wedding, a child’s birth.Today, Susie Ma’am and I had a slightly unexpected milestone.
Earlier this week, the oldest Senior Campers (17-18 year olds) went on a three-day retreat to the Davis Mountains in West Texas. During the trip, each Senior Camper wrote a personal mission statement.
These mission statements are not about what career they will pursue or where they will live. Instead, they are assertions about what they will value, who they will be. The Senior Campers literally write them on a mountain-top. They then share them with each other, soliciting feedback. Often, the first draft is self-conscious or forced. Their fellow Senior Campers (who know them incredibly well) help bring out honestly and authenticity.
Over the years, we have heard some deeply moving thoughts. These young people are committed to making a contribution. They are willing to be honest with themselves and with others.
We have a special dinner with them tonight where we cook in our wood-fired oven. They have sautéed vegetables, Portobello mushrooms with balsamic vinegar, steaks, artisan sausages and salmon. It is more feast than dinner.
After that, they come into the house and read their mission statements.
Here is why today is a milestone. Our twin sons are among the 22 Senior Campers who shared their mission statements today.
17 years ago, our twins were born prematurely. At birth, they fit into my hand. They spent 4 weeks in the neonatal ICU at the hospital.
Now the arc of their lives as campers is drawing to an end. On Saturday, they will be graduates of the Senior Camper program. For 11 summers, they have been campers like your children. Now, they are really young men.
As parents, we often fail to see how much our children grow. When we look at them, we sorta see them as they currently are, but we also can conjure the images of them as awkward 10 year-olds, as wobbling bike riders, as toddlers.
As babies that fit into your hand.
Seeing them read about the men they will become, the veil of childhood is truly lifted. I see only adults. College is coming soon. They will be embracing and challenging life without us.
This realization is so exciting, but it comes with a touch of melancholy.
We only get so much time with them. Soon, they will share their talents with the world. I like that, but know that I will miss them.
We have protected and provided for them for years. We have also (hopefully) prepared them. Now, they become our gift to the world. I think the world will like this gift.
Steve Sir
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All I needed was a magic lamp.Before I explain the lamp comment, I need to tell you about Friendship Circles and Man Caves. Both Susie Ma’am and I make a point of spending a full hour with every cabin. We learned years ago that directors are like school principals – they spend lots of time with children that are struggling and get very little carefree, hang out time with groups of kids.
But we love spending time with campers on “normal” days hearing their jokes, stories and insights.
Our answer is to invite each cabin to our house. We give them slushies, Doritos and Oreos. As a rule, we serve healthy snacks at Camp Champions, but Susie and I are not above cheating so that the campers look forward to the visits.
We then talk about life and camp. Typically, we have some activity that acts as an icebreaker. Susie has the girls make objects using 6 foot long pipe cleaners. I have kits from Lego Education that have a wide variety of pieces that enable the campers to build models of camp or their cabin.
We also get to learn about their cabins and their lives at home.
We have learned a few lessons from doing this.
- I think every boy has a deep and undeniable desire to operate a shushee machine. This is a rule without a clear exception.
- Never get a group of girls talking about their pets. This is a conversation without end.
- 8th grade boys are twice as likely to spill a slushee than a 2nd grade boy. Nope, does not make sense to me either.
- Once a group of 9 year-old girls start giggling loudly, you are done. The hope is you only have a few minutes left, because order is lost.
OK, I can now explain the picture above.
As Susie Ma’am ended a Friendship Circle with the oldest girls’ cabin, she called me to the room with her. The girls (young women) had written a song for their cabin inspection. Girls often create elaborate presentations for their inspectors. On the boys side, we are simply glad when the cabin no longer looks like a tornado hit.
This cabin had re-written the words to “A Whole New World” from Alladin so that it was entirely about inspection. They invited me to take a “magic carpet ride” and demonstrate the song. They placed a tie-dyed blanket on a stool, asked me to sit on it, and then flapped the blanket as if it were a magic carpet.
They then sang and dance. The picture is from this presentation.
But this group was not limited to a musical performance. Susie shared that they also had some impressive insights into life at camp.
First, they raved about being technology free for 3 weeks. They may not admit this to parents (after all, they might not want any additional prohibition at home), but they love not worrying about text messages, Instagram and other forms of social media. Instead of screen-to-screen time, they bask in face-to-face interactions.
One 14 year old commented about switching sessions. She had attended a later session and came to second term for the first time this year. Here is what she shared:
“I have been in this cabin for only 8 days. If I met people at home 8 days ago, I would barely know them. But camp fosters intense friendships in a way that the outside world cannot create. Part of that is the lack of technology, but much of it is the culture of inclusion, acceptance and genuineness. My cabinmates feel like sisters.”
Insight plus choreography and music made for an impressive combination.
Steve Sir
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Each Sunday, we conclude the day with a gathering called Vespers. The girls meet at their sailpoint while the boys meet at ours. The picture today is a painting made by our Fine Arts Department Head of boys’ vespers.Vespers is one of my favorite times at camp because we get a chance to celebrate our community and reflect on the week. I know this sounds solemn, but let me assure you that two decades of camp have taught is that young campers only have so much reflection in them, so the entire gathering is generally less than half an hour.
But it is an important half hour. We gather around separate campfires, with the girls on their sailpoint and the boys on theirs. We wear white shirts. The shirts are not symbolic of anything really, but they are used just to set the experience apart from the rest of the week. Sometimes, an inside-out camp uniform shirt is the closest we have to a white shirt, but that works just fine.
Susie Ma’am leads girls’ vespers. Her theme is “never put the keys to your happiness in someone else’s hands. She tells the girls that everyone tells the world how they expect to be treated. If you want to be respected, respect yourself and others. She suggests ways to carry yourself so that you let the world know that you are strong and worth knowing. We are all responsible for our won happiness.
She suggested that camp is a wonderful place to try new things, stretch yourself and practice being spectacular.
I suspect that she will be asking girls “who has your keys” for a while.
On the guys’ side, we talked about appreciation. We did Grateful Deeds, where campers publicly acknowledge acts of kindness in others.
I told them the Tiger Story about how each of us is a powerful and unique tiger that is capable of extraordinary things (I will share the story with you in a later blog).
I than asked the boys to do something challenging – be silent for 2 minutes. During that time, I asked them to listen to the sounds, feel the breeze, watch the sunset and think about all the wonderful things in their life. We encouraged them to appreciate the families that love them enough to share the gift of camp, cabinmates that are fun and willing to play, and counselors that are awesome and supportive.
We all have so much to be grateful for. I think it is wonderful when we take the time to do so.
Also, being with almost 200 boys and men sitting in silence together is a pretty cool experience. Susie similarly loves her time with the girls as they all stare into the fire and share.
After Vespers, all the campers got Sunday Sundaes (ice cream with multiple possible toppings) as a special treat to celebrate our first full week together.
We now go happily into our next week together. I love the second week. Everyone understands the rhythms of camp and knows our traditions. The first year campers are no longer “new” campers and camp feels like a family.
Perhaps a very loud and chaotic family, but a family nonetheless!
Steve Sir
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The smallest things can bring joy to a day. This morning, I left early to take one of our twins to the airport (he is going to camp in New Hampshire having finished 3 weeks here) and I returned during the middle of first activity around 9:20.As I walked into the house, I looked out our windows onto camp.
On our tennis courts was the Elite Tennis class. This class if for campers who want to hone their skills each day during first period. The strokes looked great, the campers smiling and the counselors provided personal instruction.
My eye then drifted to the grassy field next to the court. There is saw the youngest cabin of girls (Riggabamboo) dashing about, suddenly freezing, dashing again, suddenly holding hands up and dancing, and then freezing again.
It was heart-breakingly cute.
Clearly, the counselor was creating some mutant form of “Simon says” and “red light, green light”. What I loved most was seeing how every girl was completely engaged. When they froze, they were statues. When they were told to run about, they were little whirlwinds.
The counselor would occasionally whisper to make sure the girls were really focused. He was having as much fun as they were.
The class was "Mini Fitness". This is not an easy class to run, since 7 and 8-year-old girls are rarely thinking about fitness. Fitness for a Mini is running and dashing. Exactly what I was seeing.
You might not think much of this interaction. It simply looks like silly fun. But I saw several greats things. First, all but two of the 10 girls were returning from last year. So I knew that 8 new campers were smiling and giggling in one of their first regular camp activities.
Second, the counselor recognized that a group this young should have a playful period rather than an instructional one to accomplish the goals. When campers are having fun, they become part of the camp community very readily. This group did not need drills, they needed giggles.
Third, I kept seeing him smile as well. They were all having fun together. Campers are more likely to respond to adults that engage with them and interact with them than adults that are stand-offish. We were showing these girls the kinds of counselors that we value.
Finally, he was letting the girls modify the rules as they played. I found out later that it started as “red light, green light” and kept morphing at the recommendation of the girls. When a suggestion came up, he would ask them if they wanted to change the game of stick with the same rules. They would collaborate for a moment and dictate their preference as a group. As a result, this silly darting about on a grassy field became an exercise in collaboration and communication.
The reports from all over the camp are coming in great today. The new tower at the Swim Bay is a huge hit. The campers are particularly delighted with the new zip line.
The Pirate Ship provided challenges to the campers while also delighting them.
I hear nothing but the best reports from all the activities.
In short, camp is in full swing and we are enjoying every moment.
Steve Sir
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Whenever we get to the third week of a session, I am always struck by the same phenomenon. It is something of a time anomaly.
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Yesterday, I shared Steve’s speech at Harvard. Today I would like to share two other items that I hope you will enjoy.
First, Steve has been writing for Psychology Today for almost 3 full years. His blog is called “S’mores and More” and shares insights in parenting, youth development and education.
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I am a very lucky man. 
Each session, we have an initiation ceremony where campers learn whether they are Trojans or Spartans for our team competitions. Part of camp is to create unusual and memorable moments for the campers. Some moments are created by activities. Water toys (being pulled on an inflatable around the lake), Pirate Ship (climbing and traversing above the ground), horseback, archery and ceramics are all examples of activities that are often only done at camp.
Our torchlight ceremony is different and special. It also creates fun memories.
When a camp is at its best, it finds ways to manufacture extra opportunities for memories.
The Trojan-Spartan initiation is one such event.
Every camper becomes a Trojan or a Spartan and participates in our Trojan-Spartan games, which we have 3 times between now and Closing Day. Once initiated, a camper is “A Trojan (or Spartan) for life.” We designed the initiation to feel special and memorable.
The returning campers all “paint up” – red for Spartans, blue for Trojans. Members of the Leadership Team (who are all neutral) officiate over the ceremony. Each new camper comes up and learns his or her team. The exact details of the process are slightly different for boys and the girls, but the essence is the same. The event feels weighty. The teams cheer loudly and welcome their new members. We paint the campers with their team color and share stories around campfires.
If you take a step back, it is really pretty silly. We are bunch of young adults (your humble narrator as the notable exception) covered in paint, holding torches and talking about Hellenic Greece. OK, I understated. It is completely silly.
Unless it is not.
We tell the counselors that they have the opportunity to make any moment magical, but they must embrace being the magicians. We will have thousands of moments that are silly or fun, but not as many that are serious. We challenge them to “hold the space” and make this gathering memorable.
I was delighted at how the counselors and the Senior Campers (members of our high school leadership program) rose to the occasion. As I looked at the faces of campers, I saw excitement and awe. They were not just boys anymore, but heroes. Susie Ma’am reports that girls’ initiation was also a great gathering of heroes.
Not a bad night on Lake LBJ.
Steve Sir
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